Folksiness

The VFMF mascot, Pete Seagull. Can't beat folky humour...

Egads, where have I been all this time? Well, Dearest Friends, abroad for a good chunk of it. Abroad for me and many of you, in yer backyard for some. You see, I was in the good ole U.S. of A with the family, visiting Mother. Almost two weeks we were there, staying on the upper fluke of Long Island's tail like sea lice on a whale. And I had intended to tell y'all all about it, honest. But the whole trip became so wrapped up and impacted and encased in baggage that the story grew hard to tell without scratchy rawness and muddle and destructive emotions. I did try for the past week, mind you, thinking that forcing it out into the light of blog would disentangle it, make it easier to reconcile the strands. However, all my attempt just ended up in frustratingly tighter knots. Sigh, and fuckit...

So then, let's talk about shinier, happier stuff. And what's shinier and happier than MUSIC, hmm?? This weekend coming up is one I've been looking forward to all year, because it's that of the annual Vancouver Folk Music Festival!! Yay!! As you may recall from here and here, I've grown very fond of the Festival and is broadly stretchy definition of "folk" (Celtic fiddles? Check. Bhangra? Check. Dub? Check.) , so much so that this year will mark my third as a volunteer. In return for 12 hours of putting life & limb on the line as a security pig, I get to go for free and get fed mung bean soup! W to the O to the O to the T!!

Undoubtedly it'll be someone I never heard of who blows me away (cf Old Man Luedecke, Rodney DeCroo, and Abigail Washburn), but as usual there are a few acts in the lineup who I'm interested in seeing for one reason or another. Winnipeg's folk-funk-popsters The Weakerthans I've been keen to see for a while now. Likewise Basia Bulat, over whom many of my lovely blogobuddies have been drooling for some time. Los de Abajo promise to offer up a mix of Mexican mariachiness and ska - how can one resist that?? And it will be interesting to see Arrested Development (yes, Mr Wendel's friends) show off their daisy-age hip hop (remember: "broadly stretchy definition of folk") as they promote their first North American album in 12 years.

And then there are The Proclaimers. Um, yes...

Why the hesitation? Well, as a yoof I loved their debut LP, "This Is The Story" (especially the brilliant rant against linguistic fascism, "Throw the 'R' Away"), their frantically earnest singing, their Red politics, and their engaging live performances. "Sunshine on Leith" didn't do it as much for me, but I still enjoyed the album, particularly "Jean." From then on it all went a bit adrift; I found I didn't relate to their strong, overtly religious stuff, while their strident nationalism --like almost all of its kind-- left me uneasy. Then there was "I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)," which, thanks to goddamn Benny & Joon, got stuck in the heads of mononeuronic eedjits everywhere as the beginning and end of all Caledonian lyricism: "Oh, I LOVE Scottish music! I listen to The Proclaimers all the time!! 'I would walk foyve-hundred moyles...' " Now I realise that all of this is my problem, and not that of Messrs Reid & Reid, but it is the monkey that I am bringing with me on my back. But I'm also bringing open ears and an open mind, in the hopes of (once again) being delighted. We shall see.

Dearest Friends, I'll give you a fuller report after the Fest, but in the meantime would you like a smattering of tunes?

The Weakerthans - Tournament of Hearts (buy here)
Los de Abajo - Joder (buy here or e-here)
The Proclaimers - Throw the 'R' Away (buy here)

And as is customary in the run-up to the Festival, please allow me to mock in advance all of the dirty hippies I'll have to endure with their tie-dye, unchecked body hair, sweaty-patchouli stink, and helicopter dancing. They're actually all quite lovely, but I have an image to maintain.

The Dead Milkmen - The Thing That Only Eats Hippies (buy here)

Cheese, Glorious Cheese!

Dancing across the Stilton wall, Neal's Yard Dairy.
Snapped by semiotheque

Hello Dearest Friends, remember me?? You do??? How good of you!!! Right, it's time to (re)start this party right, it's time to (re)start it cheesy! Yes, Dearest TiM was gracious enough this week to turn this week's Contrast Podcast over to my favourite foodstuff, le fromage. I can't get enough of the shizz- mind you, I'm talking about tha good stuff, not your waxy Kraft slices toilet paper or Velveeta toejam. No, I mean the molten pungency of Stinking Bishop, the essential goatiness of a log of Golden Cross, the creamy prickle of a slab of Cashel Blue, the better-than-sexness of an Epoisses....

Findings songs about cheese seemed to pose a challenge for the CP Nation, but rose to it they did, and there was some excellent lateral thinking, such as Kevin's choice of the well matured Barry Manilow. You can dowload the whole cheeseboard here, or have a peek below at what's what:

(00:00) The Evaporators - (I’ve got a disease) I’m addicted to cheese
FiL from Pogoagogo
(06:20) Dick ‘Two Ton’ Baker - I like stinky cheese
The In Crowd from I’m learning to share!
(09:13) Chenard Walcker - Cream cheese
Eiron from The S+7 Method
(11:51) The Mouldy Peaches - Cheese
Tricia
(13:40) The UMCs - Blue cheese
Greer from A Sweet Unrest
(18:00) Gong - Dynamite / I am your animal
Chris from Phosphorous.net
(23:09) Heartless Bastards - Done got old
Tart from Love Shack, Baby
(27:13) Cheeseburger - Tiger
Andy from How Marvellous
(30:49) Exploding White Mice - Let the kids dance
Dirk from Sexy Loser
(34:40) Monty Python’s Flying Circus - Cheese shop
Tim from The face of today
(39:20) Bear Hunter - My nemesis the cheesegrater
Linda from Speed of Dark
(45:17) Lyle Lovett - Here I am
Jeremy from Fingertips
(50:00) Stark Effect - Bunnyrabbits, satan, cheese and milk
Rhiannah
(53:02) +44 - Make you smile
James from Appetite For Distraction
(57:48) Richard Cheese - Rape me
Stuart from The Accies Blog
(01:00:31) The Photographic - Millie rode to heaven on the back of an orca
John Q.
(01:07:37) Barry Manilow - Can’t smile without you
Kevin

My pick this week was obvious, I must admit; on top of it being about a cheese addiction, it's served up by local garage band Thee Evaporators, which is fronted by Vancouver's very own madcap, musical savant, Nardwuar the Human Serviette. Nardwuar's become something of a fixture in Vancouver, and indeed nationally in Canada, for his goofy guerrilla interviews with musical luminaries. Rather than explain, have a look at his pisstakey chat with Hilary Duff. Yes, I said Hilary Duff.

I wasn't always a cheese addict, you know. Though I was fond of the curd, it wasn't until I moved to London in the mid-1990s that I became exposed to the full panoply of fantastic fromagery. It started with an epiphany: a visit to Neal's Yard Dairy in Covent Garden. I fell in love instantly with the stacks of Stilton truckles against the wall and the deep, rich smell of dozens of fine British cheeses that suffused the tiny shop. Several years later we moved to southwest London, and my local train station happened to be right next to The Teddington Cheese, another tiny Tardis packed with cheeserifficness from across Europe. I lost my virginity to Stinking Bishop in that shop. I fretted that my move to Vancouver would strip me of ready access to decent cheese, but Providence smiled when She gave me a job within walking distance of Les Amis Du Fromage, and then did so again when two brothers named Benton opened up their labour of love within striking distance of home.

But my Dearest Friends, it is rather paradoxical that this podcast has come out during a time when I am off the cheese and will be so for the next few weeks. You see, as I have begun my journey past the big four-oh, I decided the time had come to take matters corporeal in hand and get myself fit. So I started this running lark (about which more soon) and decided to pay closer attention to what and how much I was stuffing in my gob. With Dearest Mentok as my bodhisattva, I embarked on the unthinkable and started a diet, the South Beach one. I tell you, it's working a treat; I feel miles fitter, have dropped a waist size, and shed around 15 lbs so far. Yes, I miss the cheese, but the regime offers enough diversionary food to allow me to power on through. And I know it'll be waiting for me soon...

But back to the music. Had it not been for Nardwuar, I would have had to think laterally. And this is where my mind would have gone:

Fatima Mansions - Blues for Ceausescu (buy here)
Perhaps he would have fancied a nice gorgonzola, or maybe a sharp Picos blue. BTW, I have been known to run around shouting in falsetto: "I am Nicolae Ceausescu and I want my country back!!" Long story.

Jenn Grant - Blue Skies (buy here or e-here)
An antithesis to the previous song, performed by the wonderfully ethereal, PEI-born Jenn Grant. I really took a shine to her when she played last year's Vancouver Folk Music Festival (more about 2009's fest coming up soon). I think she'd like a more subtle Beenleigh blue.

Stereolab - French Disko (buy here)
I like French discotheques, cos they dance around to synthy pop while noshing on fromage. I think I could quite happily bop to this while enjoying a Mimolette Vieux.

Deen - In The Disco (buy here if you are loaded)
Speaking of discos, let's face it: nothing smells more strongly of cheese than this, Bosnia and Herzegovina's dancetastic entry for the 2004 Eurovision Song Contest. Finished in 9th place - they wuz robbed!!

Eat The Rich

Overheard recently:

"The fundraising drive for the construction of the community centre tennis courts was very successful. There's even $20,000 left over which can be used to resurface them in a few years time."

"Oh, I resurface mine every year."

Motörhead - Eat The Rich (buy here or e-here)

Shragadelic

Yes, yes, I know it's been ages since we've gotten together. Mea culpa, mea maxima culpa. Now look, I can fritter my time away explaining how I was held prisoner by Morlocks in the wastelands of Mississauga, then besieged by small people and forced to work in the salt mines, or I can get on with what I came here to do, namely draw your attention to some fine music. The choice is yours.

What's that? You're going for the music?

You sure??

You have chosen wisely...

Dearest Friends, I suppose it was almost three years ago that I came across Shrag's debut single, "Pregnancy Scene," while frolicking through the meadows of the interwebbynet. The dang thing stuck to me like a burr, what with its eerily parping synthline, stalking guitar, and SHOUTY vocals. Rather than pick the thing off my woolly jumper, I left it there, hoping it would grow into more tunes. Alas, though this Brighton-based quintet have released a total of five singles over the past two-plus years, all of them have been on lovely, yet postally inconvenient vinyl. And thus I have had to make do with what I had. So imagine my joy when I discovered the other week (only four months late, I'm sooo cutting edge) that Shrag had finally bundled their singles together, thrown in a couple of extra tracks, and released the whole scrummy, squirming mess on an eponymous album available both as a see-dee AND in newfangled digitalese. Hooray!!

So what will you find when you dig down? Rich, crystalline veins of angular post-punk riffage, dense deposits of bolshy pop attitude, and a mother lode of sardonic savvy. Gems include "Talk To The Left," which sets us all straight on matters of ardour (Did he really say "baby, now I'm heading south"? / Funny, I was almost there / And then he opened his mouth) and "Mark E Smith," which makes a helluva brain-churning racket. But go beyond the upper crust of sarcasm and shoutiness, and you'll find caves full of emotion and feeling as well; "Hopelessly Wasted" is an aching break-up song, while the marvellous "Forty Five 45s" drips with melancholy memories of a relationship entwined with a singles collection. Le sigh.

Then there's their name itself - how deliciously succulent! Go on, say it: "Shrag." Can't you just taste the juiciness? And its very sound brings to mind cheesy 70s carpets, immensely satisfying copulation, shrubbery, goofy sea birds, corrupt elections, and soulful dancing. Oh yes, what a combo! Just forget the prosaic fact that it's actually an acronym for Sussex Heights Roving Artists Group - an in joke, apparently.

In June they'll be playing several UK dates supporting The Pains Of Being Pure At Heart, and I'd give vital parts of my anatomy to see one of those shows. But alas, anatomy is no substitute for time and money...

Right, enough verbiage, here's some tuneage:

Shrag - Forty Five 45s (buy here or e-here)

Oh, and while we're at it you might as well also have the ooer, fnarr fnarr video of "Talk To The Left:"

Bad Experience

Origami cleverness from here

When I first saw it, I didn't believe it. I thought it was a joke, something crafted by a latteklatsch of ultra-cool, web-savvy, hyper-ironic hipsters with designer haircuts.

But it's not.

It's real.

And it made me nauseous.

Step right up folks, you too can have the ultimate Rock & Roll Experience. Yes, for a mere $7,999 you'll get to play in a rock band with "world-famous musicians!" Jam with "iconic rockers!" Attend private workshops with "platinum rock stars!!!" What's more, the price of this 5-day package includes luxury hotel accommodation at the four-star Hotel Renew in Honolulu!!!! You will be "treated like a celebrity and catered to accordingly!!!!!" Confirmed rock gods participating are Glen Matlock (he was always the weediest Pistol anyway), Gerard V. Casale (Devolution, indeed) and Wayne Kramer (say it ain't so!!).

Dearest Friends, this is a travesty. This is not rock 'n' roll. This is balding, fiftysomething, system analysts with their remaining strands of hair scraped behind their heads into dork handles. This is Euro trustafarian brats decked out in Bench and Von Dutch. This is the annoying, botox-injected fucker who cut me off today in his Porsche Boxter. This is whore meets john.

Oh my, I think I need a cocktail of proper music on the rocks to clear the taste of sick from my throat...

Chuck Berry - Johnny B. Goode (buy here or e-here)
Subway Sect - Different Story (buy here or e-here)
Dead Kennedys - Pull My Strings (buy here or e-here)
Sex Pistols - The Great Rock 'n' Roll Swindle (buy here or e-here)

In The Mood For Ska

Rudettes and dansette penned by the mahvellous Bishakh Som © 2009

It's been a lovely Friday, what with it being the end of the week and a glorious, late afternoon burst of sunshine apologizing for the rest of the day's rain & gloom. When it's lovely outside, I feel lovely inside - call me shallow, and I will plead guilty. And so it is I find myself in the mood for some old time ska. Come along, Dearest Friends, the rude girls have cranked up the dansette and as the glorious sunset fades into starry evening, it's time to skank the night away.

Lord Tanamo - I'm In The Mood For Ska (buy here )

The Ethiopians - Train To Skaville (buy here or e-here)

Shenley Duffus - Rukumbine (buy here)

Dandy Livingstone - Rudy, A Message To You (buy here)

The Bleechers - Check Him Out (buy here)

Derrick & Patsy - Housewife's Choice (buy here or e-here)