He's A Whore

Yes, Dearest Friends, that is me you see to the left, whoring myself unashamedly. I have become a brazen strumpet, standing on the corner of Independence Avenue and Groovy Musique Street, offering myself up to all who will pay.

But it is for a good cause. Scratch that, it is for (as they say frequently here in North America) an awesome cause. You see, the most excellent DJ Colleen Crumbcake, curatrix of the wonderful Sandy Acres Sound Lab on East Village Radio, needs to raise sufficient funds by month-end to keep her weekly show on the air/ether. With only a couple of days to go, she is finding herself short, so I'm asking you, Dearest Friends, to help out if you can.

Why should you contribute? Here, let me spell it out for you (after I readjust my g-string... just a bit more... ahhh, that's better):

REASON #1: East Village Radio is a free, independent internet radio station that offers up a bubbling jambalaya of diverse music, culture, and commentary. Its funding comes from sponsorships raised by its motivated, committed DJs. Your contribution, Tender Comrades, will strike a blow for indie radio and against bland, corporate samey-sameyness.

REASON #2: Though EVR is physically located in Noo Yawk Siddy, you can listen regardless of where and in which timezone you are. EVR broacasts live via a streaming feed, but you can also download individual show podcasts for delectation at your leisure. Listen in the bath! While doing the ironing! On the bus! In your yurt on the Mongolian plain! The possibilities are endless!!

REASON #3: Chere Mademoiselle la DJ Colleen Crumbcake spins the most exquisite combination of tuneage that you're likely to hear anywhere. From the varied yarns of Hot Chip, Buzzcocks, France Gall, Prince, Stereolab, Lady Sovereign, and Roxy Music, she can effortlessly knit the grooviest of musical cardigans. I tell ya, she's worth every single penny.

REASON #4: Colleen's got a lorra, lorra nifty swag to give away. A contribution of $35 will get you a brilliant CD mixed by her own fair hand, while $100 will get you said disc AND a special goodie (CD or merchandise) donated by Mint records (or one of their brethren). On top of all this, whoever donates the most money to the cause will get all of the above PLUS an original painting by Brooklyn artist Steve Keene (see his work here).

So there you have it folks, I hope at least some of you are moved to support this worthiest of causes. If you are, you can do so RIGHT NOW via Paypal by clicking RIGHT HERE. Every little bit helps!!

And please hurry up - these goddamn heels are killing me...

Big Black - He's A Whore (buy here)
Joy Division - Transmission (buy here)
Comsat Angels - Independence Day (buy here)
Elbow - Independent Woman (not sure where you can buy, but look at the kitties here)
The Flying Lizards - Money [That's What I Want] (buy here)
The Ramones - Do You Remember Rock 'n' Roll Radio? (buy here)
The Clash - Radio Clash (buy here)
The Selecter - On My Radio (buy here)
Stereo Total - Ma Radio (buy here or e-here)

Now We Are One

Birthday cake baked here

This week Contrast Podcast has invited us all to help celebrate its first birthday. Yes, it has been fifty-two weeks since the wonderful Tim Young gave birth to his bouncing baby, and look how it's grown under his careful parentage! As one of CP's contributing uncles, can I just say how proud I am of the little nipper.

Happy, Happy, Happy Birthday, Dearest Contrast Podcast!! Right, now on to the jelly and ice cream and cake and prezzies. And the music. We're gonna have a party, all night long. You can join the fun here, or sign up to this RSS feed: http://feeds.feedburner.com/ContrastPodcast.

So what are we waiting for? Let's let it rip with Billy Bragg, Tom Waits, The Cucumbers, and, er, the luscious Cherry Sorbet!!!!

Playlist:
(00:00) Sky Larkin - Young lungs
Tim from The Face of Today
(03:11) Ariane - Ice cream
FiL from Pogoagogo
(07:13) The Go Betweens - Born to a family
Mark from Cinema du Lyon
(10:35) Bud Melvin - 1+1=1+1
Cindy from Adzuki bean stash
(16:25) Tom Waits - Table Top Joe
Lyle from Mentok the Mindtaker
(21:46) C.K.Stead - Birthday sonnet
John from You must be from away
(23:32) My Life Story - Birthday suit
ZB from So the wind won’t blow it all away
(27:53) The Cucumbers - My birthday
Natalie from Mini-Obs
(31:19) The Replacements - Birthday gal
Tom from Other people’s toys
(35:44) Blood Music - It’s a party
Ross from Just gimme indie rock
(40:23) Atom & His Package - Happy Birthday Ralph
Marcy from Lost in your inbox
(42:47) Billy Bragg & Wilco - I was born
Crash from Pretending life is like a song


I did indeed consider a few other musical presents for Contrast Podcast's b'day, but I also thought a spell about all the lovely gifts that CP has given me - new songs, reintroductions to old songs, and introductions to some really wonderful people. Real people, not virtual ones. So thank you, Dearest Tim, and thank you, Dearest Contrast Podcasters. Each and every one of you.

Here, let me share some of my favourite gifts from the past year:

Teddybears Sthlm - Hey Boy (buy here)
Thanks, SAS !

Bratmobile - Where Eagles Dare (buy here or e-here)
Thanks, Bob !

The Field Mice - Song Six (buy here )
Thanks, Dearest Colin !

Victor Scott - Mareel (buy e-here)
Thanks, Victor !

Next week, the Songchain continues to be forged. I can hear the clink-clink-clink of hammer on anvil as the links are shaped. What fun!!!

Go Fish

The view outside

It has been raining for days and days and days. Occasionally as a fine mist, sometimes as a torrential cascade, mostly as dull, mundane showers. It has become rather wearing. We walk around looking like soaked prunes, our skin all wrinkled by the ubiquitous moisture. I'm developing webs between my fingers, and I think I'm seeing gills starting to sprout on the kids.

On Tuesday, however, the rain eased up for few hours. I seized the opportunity afforded and ventured outside the office for lunch. I had intended to head over to Granville Island, but I could tell that the steely clouds watching were considering whether or not to douse me. So instead I diverted to the nearby Go Fish.

Dearest Friends, Go Fish is a treat. Its modest accommodation, in a neat but small shack down by False Creek Fishermen's Wharf, belies the scrummy seafood it serves up. Truth be told, I try and avoid going there on all but the rarest of occasons. You see, I have eaten in many a fine chippie, so I feel quaified to say that, fins down, they serve up the most delish fish 'n' chips in the northern hemishere*; huge roof tiles of heavenly halibut in perfect, crisp, golden, beer batter with just-right thumbs of potato. So for the sake of my arteries and waistline, I deny myself.

So on Tuesday, lured by the shack's siren call, I forewent the halibut and plumped instead for an oyster po' boy. Three enormous, juicy, fresh oysters grilled simply and served upon a superb, ciabatta-esque bun with salsa and onions. Oh, look, someone's posted a piccie of one here. After a sort spell gazing out at the trawlers at dock, my name was called and the sarnie was wrapped up in newspaper (Yes! It's true! How glorious!!) by a lovely tattooed woman. I hustled the scrumptious package back to my desk, just beating the clouds as they decided to open up again.

It's been raining pretty much ever since.

*I've not sampled any Antipodean examples, hence my geographic restriction. Second place goes to Bryan's in Headingly, and third to the chippie in Bradwell, where on Friday evening you'l wait the better part of an hour wating as the entire village drops by to pick up supper.

The King Khan & BBQ Show - Fish Fight (buy here or e-here)
Thowing Muses - Fish (buy here or e-here)
Dressy Bessy - Who'd Stop The Rain (buy here )

Doing It For Tha Kidz

Riot Grrl
Darling Daughter, 2004

Perhaps in some sort of attempt to redress the karmic balance thrown so out of whack by the X-Rated episode, Contrast Podcast this week has gone all child-friendly this week. On offer is a magic kingdom of tunes, suitable for kids of all ages. So put on your beanie hats, scootch up on the playrug, and either download the podcast here or subscribe using this RSS feed: http://feeds.feedburner.com/ContrastPodcast

Come raid the toychest:
(00:00) Kidditunes - Twistin’ again
Tim from The Face of Today
(02:04) Medeski, Martin & Wood - Where’s the music?
The Duke of Straw from The Late Greats
(05:55) The Flaming Lips - Yoshimi battles the pink robots (part one)
Crash from Pretending life is like a song
(10:52) The Dickies - Theme to Gigantor
Lyle from Mentok the Mindtaker
(13:41) Misty’s Big Adventure - Biscuit Tin
Shawn from Cold Citrus
(15:43) The Real Tuesday Weld - Bathtime in Clerkenwell
FiL from Pogoagogo
(20:27) John Lithgow - You gotta have skin
Marcy from Lost in your inbox
(23:11) Captain Bogg & Salty - Scurvy
Rick from Are you embarrassed easily?
(26:19) Blind Melon - Three is the magic number
Chris from Culturebully
(29:38) Harry Belafonte & Odetta - There’s a hole in my bucket
Deek from Pod of Funk
(34:36) Dan Zanes & John Doe - So long (It’s been good to know yuh)
Natalie from Mini-Obs
(39:14) The Go Team - Hold your terror close
Mike from Nothing but green lights
(41:34) The Innocence Mission - Moon River
Chad from Everybody cares, everybody understands
(44:37) Rasputina - This little piggy
Nuno from Undercover songs
(48:30) Boris Pickett & The Crypt Kickers - Monster mash
Mark from Cinema du Lyon
(52:04) Papa Noel - Democratie
SAS Radio
(59:16) Tom Waits - The train song
Fraser from BKYLN song of the day

I'm a lucky, lucky Daddy. You see, my Darling Daughter and Little Man (7 and 4, respectively) grew up with their Pa singing not "Mary Had A Little Lamb" and "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, but "Sheena Is A Punk Rocker" and "A New England." And they seem to have taken very happily to it all. Yes, they get their fix of Dora the Explorer, Thomas the Tank Engine, and Wiggles muzak while they rot their brains in front of the TV. But it's The Real Tuesday Weld, Camera Obscura, and The Ramones (the latter favoured more by Little Man) that they ask for when riding in the car...

So, what else did I consider submitting this week? Well, Camera Obscura was up there, but I've rabbited on about their wonderfulness enough for the time being, methinks. And I wouldn't inflict The Wiggles on you, so rest easy...

Pianosaurus - Bubble Gum Music (buy here)
This whimsical trio released only one album of sweet indie rock played entirely on toy instruments. Drummer Steve Dansiger went on to play grown-up skins for a spell wth King Missile. Entirely G-rated, without being emetic.

Haysi Fantayzee - Shiny Shiny (buy here)
The first time I popped this on the stere-ere-ereo, the bairns launched into a manic interpretive dance. I proceeded to replay the song five more times, and they danced like wee goblins five more times. And let's not forget that the album this comes from is Battle Hymns for Children Singing.

The Ramones - I Don't Want To Grow Up (buy here)
A fine, fine cover of the Tom Waits oiginal. Had to get me some Ramones, if only for Little Man's sake. And as I type I'm watching Waits's superbly oddball concert film, Big Time, which I stumbled on accidentaly while channel surfing. So you can see why this all makes such perfect sense.

EDIT: Per Dearest, Dearest Brad's request, here's the astoundingly fab (and minorly creepy) video for "Bathtime in Clerkenwell." Beware the cukoos...

Computer Love

Dearest Friends, I'm so happy! What a story I have for you! But it's not really mine to tell. And you may already have heard about it over at Dearest Vinyl Villain's. So if you have, hold on to that warm, fuzzy feeling and feel free to skip on down to the celebratory tunes below.

So, that story. It's about e-boy meets e-girl in Blogtopia, then real boy meets real girl, in Utopia. Only with the Isle of Man standing in as proxy for Utopia. It's got everything: tea, twee, goth, and, erm, (sea) froth. And if it doesn't warm at least one of the cockles of your heart, then I weep for you.

So open yourself to joy. Then read about it here and here, and afterwards go here and listen starting at 03:04. Finally, pour yourself a bevvy of your choice and toast e-boy & e-girl while listening to these:

The Virgin Prunes - Pagan Love Song (buy here or e-here)
Thee Headcoatees - Ca Plane Pour Moi (buy here or e-here)
The Celibate Rifles - Let's Get Married (buy here or e-here)
Laurel Aitken - Rudi Got Married (buy here or e-here)
The King Khan & BBQ Show - Love You So (buy here or e-here)
The Cramps - Thee Most Exalted Potentate of Love (buy here or e-here)
Heavenly - I Fell In Love Last Night (buy here or e-here)
Pia Fraus -The End Of Time And Space Like We Used To Know It Is After You Have Finished Your Tea Approximately At 5:07 pm (buy here or e-here)
David Bowie - Modern Love (buy here or e-here)
Kraftwerk - Computer Love (buy here or e-here)

Cover Me, I'm Going In

Ah, this week's Contrast Podcast is going to be a real treat, I can feel it in my bones. After months of cajoling by her admirers, Liz from The Roaring Machine has joined the CP posse with a cracking theme. The challenge she set was to come up with a cover version that outshines the original song it treats, and our contributors have risen to the task in splendid fashion. I have a story to tell you about my choice, so let me husband my words: download the 'cast here, or plug in via this RSS feed: http://feeds.feedburner.com/ContrastPodcast. Oh, and listen for the astoundingly special announcement in one of the intros (not mine). Need further enticement? How about The Wedding Present, The Slits, Linda Ronstadt, Magazine? You like?? Well, they're all featured.

This week was a bit of a toughie; I've got plenty of ace cover versions, but picking ones better than the originals was a true challenge. "Just Like Heaven?" Fantastic song by The Cure, equally groovy, if totally different, cover by Dinosaur Jr. "Running Up That Hill?" A lovely cover by Placebo. "Hounds of Love?" The Futureheads storm it comprehensively. But my heart will not allow either to be actually better than the originals by my Dearest Kate Bush.

In the end, it was Shonen Knife's "Ramones-Meets-An-Andrew-Sister-In-A-Tokyo-Dive" version of the Carpenters' soppingly drippy "Top Of The World" that I chose. There were other equally worthy candidates, I'll admit. But this one had the force of memories on its side. And here's why:

Rewind the clock almost six years and you'll find FiL and his Dearest Wife on board the spartanly tacky MS Queen, somewhere between Fuling and Chongqing on the Yangtze River. We had seized the In-Laws' offer of child care for 18-month-old Darling Daughter and were exhilarated to be navigating the Three Gorges. We sailed past soaring, sheer cliffs clinging to which we could plainly see the coffins suspended on high by the Ba people some 2,500 years eariler. We gasped at the impossible peaks. We marvelled at the sprawling industrial plants that punctuated the shoreline at regular intervals. We explored Fengdu, the mountainside city of ghosts whose temples were a representation of Hell. And we did all this with the dreadful knowledge that in two years time most of what we were seeing would be gone, submerged by the rising Yangtze waters, dammed in the name of progress by the Three Gorges project.

Nocturnal entertainment on board the MS Queen was limited. So it was with great interest that Dearest Wife and I, along with Geordie Retirees Enid and George, went along one evening after dinner to watch the karaoke competition. Of the 175 passengers on board, the vast majority were from Taiwan and Hong Kong, and it soon became clear that the event was geared towards them. There were many attempts at Canto-pop crooning, and one intrepid lad even sang an acapella ode to the Yangtze that he had written just that very afternoon. At least that's what Hsiao Lung ("Little Dragon"), the closet-door-sightly-ajar gay waiter who had taken an instant shine to me upon boarding, told us it was.

After several Chongqing beers, George asked whether we should ask to give it a whirl. I was game; though I couldn't (and cannot) sing for toffee, I was intrigued by the cross-cultural possibilities. So Jackie (for that was the Anglicized name Hsiao Lung wished us to call him) brought to us the skimpy list of English songs available. George quickly chose "You Were Always On My Mind." I was having real trouble picking - no Ramones, no BilyBragg, no Pistols. Sigh. Then my eyes alighted upon "Top of the World," and I recalled not The Carpenters, but Shonen Knife. I had found my song.

So up I went on stage, and all eyes fixed on the gweilo. Well, apart from those of Dearest Wife, who was already cringing wth anticipated embarrassment. The music started, and I gave it real welly. In my mind I was covering the cover, but in reality I was cawing, croaking, prancing and hamming it up something fierce. Three minutes and a smattering of politely enthusiastic applause later, it was over. "I can't believe you did that," said Wife as I regained my seat.

When it came time for the awards, we were stunned to see George get first prize. But it was well deserved; his rendition of the Willie Nelson classic had revealed a first-rate crooner. Second prize went to the lad with he ode. Third prize went to one of the Canto-poppers. Then there was the joint third-place winner: Mr FiL. Whaaaat?? My gob was well and truly smacked. Had Jackie pulled strings for his unrequited crush? Was my barefaced cheek being rewarded? I don't know, but I do know that that night I was the joint-third-best karaoke singer on the Yangtze River. And look here, I have the bit of paper to prove it (name changed to throw off you stalkers). I owned that night.

We all celebrated in style. George and I drank loads more Chongqing and ended up, accompanied by Dearest Wife and Enid, on stage some time later with our arms around a bunch of fat Hong Kong men and their spouses singing karaoke to Michael Jackson's "We Are The World." My cross-cultural possibilities had become reality.

So there you have it. But what else did I consider?

Babes In Toyland - Calling Occupants of Interplanetary Craft (buy here)
Like the Shonen Knife tune, this is another track off the If I Were A Carpenter, erm, tribute album. This one came close. So close. In fact, I think it's only the Yangtze karaoke angle that put Shonen Knife over the edge. Kat Bjelland & co. cover one of the kookiest 70s songs ever recorded. And given how kooky that decade was, that's really saying something.

The Carpenters - Calling Occupants of Interplanetary Craft (buy here)
OK, I couldn't resist: you really must hear the this, especially for the faux DJ intro and proto-Cher vocoder effects. FACT: There are 160 musicians lurking about this recording. And to forestall the tunespotters out there, this is actually the original cover, as the song was first done by Canadian prog-rockers (it ain't all Rush around here, folks) Klaatu. Oh, alright, here you go, just stop whining:

Klaatu - Calling Occupants of Interplanetary Craft (buy here or e-here)
Klaatu barada nikto! Please, Interstellar Policeman, charge them with crimes against taste, lock them up in a polychromatic prison, and throw away the key.

The Muffs - Kids In America (buy here or e-here)
Must...flee...Carpenters. Ah, that's better. Now don't get me wrong, I was partial to the synthy "dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum" of the original. And that 80s siren Kim Wilde had my hormones raging summat fierce. But in retrospect she was only a nice, middle-class, Home Counties girl singing about stuff she knew nothing of. But as for The Muffs, well, they're the real deal.

Animal & Rank Sinatra - Ebony and Ivory (buy here)
Oh, this one came so, so close as well. Animal & Rank chew up this floppy, insipid tune with their steely teeth, gargle the resulting sludge, then spew it back forth for your listening enjoyment. The grandest of Grand Guignol.

For next week, Tim is soliciting Cool Choons for Children. So round up your kid-friendly songs and fire them off! If you need instructions, have a gander here.

Tell Me Why

Questions... Always questions...

This week Contrast Podcast poses the query: Why? And the answers, though fewer than for past questions, are wonderfully diverse. As usual, feel free to download the podcast directly via this link, or else plonk the following RSS feed into whatever nifty blog subscription thingy you use: http://feeds.feedburner.com/ContrastPodcast

(00:00) They Might Be Giants - Why does the sun shine?
Tim from The Face of Today
(03:16) The Wedding Present - Why are you being so reasonable now?
Cinema du Lyon
(06:13) Frankie Lymon & The Teenagers - Why do fools fall in love?
FiL from Pogoagogo
(09:16) Neil Young - Tell me why
Natalie from Mini-Obs
(13:19) The Weather Prophets - Why does the rain?
ZB from So the wind won’t blow it all away
(17:19) Woody Guthrie - Why oh why?
Kate from The Glorious Hum
(20:58) The Offspring - Why don’t you get a job?
Tom from Other People’s Toys
(24:36) Billy Joel - Why should I worry?
Andy from Circles of Concrete
(28:19) The Pipettes - Why did you stay? (acoustic)
Crash from Pretending life is like a song
(30:12) All Night Workers - Why don’t you smile?
Ross from Just Gimme Indie Rock
(32:50) The Beatles - Why don’t we do it in the road?
Waffles from Waffles Radio

Next week sees the debut of the lovely Liz and her well-oiled Roaring Machine on CP. Her proposed theme is guaranteed, I tell ya, to generate a most interesting podcast. So folks, dust off those cover versions that, in your esteemed opinions, are better than the original songs, whack them in an e-mail together with a recorded intro, and fire them off to Tim. You want more guidance? Well then, here you go.

Why Frankie Lymon seized my fancy so, I know not; doo-wop 'n' roll is not my preferred idiom. But when my ears and eyes alighted upon that ditty, I just knew it had to be. Anyway, as usual, I'd like to share with you those tunes that I also considered for submission this week:

The Fall - Why Are People Grudgeful? (buy here or e-here)
Even though you can never have too much Mark E. Smith, this was dismissed out of hand as he & the gang had only just put in a Contrast Podcast appearance the previous week.

Garbage - Why Do You Love Me? (buy here)
Oh Shirley, surely you don't need to ask...?

The Mooney Suzuki - Tell Me Why (buy here or e-here)
Hmm, dunno, I quite like this, but I kinda wish it was, y'know, greasier & grungier. And I'm also not so keen on the band's subsequent corporate tie-ins. But given that Buzzcocks are also selling cars, maybe I'm being a bit of a hypocrite. Argh, I've tied myself up in an FiLosophical knot.

Voices of Darmstadt

Someone had somehow wangled an invitation to a massive, all-night party at the Johann Wolfgang Goethe University of Frankfurt. As a result we were all drunk. Pished as the proverbial newts. So it made perfect sense, on that Saturday almost exactly twelve years ago, to pile into a photo booth as we waited at 4:30 AM on the platform at Frankfurt Hauptbahnhof for the first train of the day to take us back to Darmstadt. The carriages pulled up on time (of course), and we poured ourselves through the slam-door and into a compartment, snorting and guffawing and shrieking. Probably singing as well, but my memory is hazy.

Thirty minutes or perhaps an hour later we clanked into our station and I opened the door latch and clambered out. I recall thinking the step down was rather far, but it wasn't until all for of us had exited that we realized we had gotten off on the wrong side. We were not on the platform, but on the gravel bed between two sets of railroad tracks. Hooting with laughter, we climbed back through the wagon, rolled out the station, and made our grand entrance into the lobby of the Maritim Rhein-main Hotel. We collapsed on sofas, waiting for the breakfast buffet to open at 6:00 AM while being ignored by the fastidiously unifomed commercial flight crews gathering to be bussed to Frankfurt Airport. We subsequently fed, then slumbered.

Darmstadt...

To this day I do not understand why The Bank decided to fly its management trainees from London for a three-week incarceration at a faceless business hotel in a pokey satellite of Frankfurt. But imprisoned we were, and force-fed both German food (I remember begging the restaurant staff at the start of Week Two for a salad that swam not in a sea of cream dressing) and teachings on corporate finance. Our Overseer was an embittered, dipsomaniac, veteran banker of questionable mental stability. The lecturers, mostly flown in from London as well (go figure) were largely uninspiring; indeed, the one I recall best was a pompous little shit who looked uncannily like Leo Sayer with owl-eye spectacles.

To tell you the truth, I cannot recall one single thing of what I was supposed to learn during those twenty-one days. Not a sausage. Or wurst. What I do remember vividly are the handful of occasions -and there were only three or so- when we left the hotel and ran riot, simply to feel free.

For most of my comrades, I wager these few bacchanalia were simply a chance to let off steam, to take a break from forging their young careers. Of those in the photo above, three have moved on to positions of note within the financial world; a Managing Director in charge of Structured Credit, a Head of Client Relationship Management, a Vice-President Product Manager.

But look at the bloke on the left. Yes, that's me, your FiL. For me those drunken rushes were when the doubt that mildly nagged me during lectures on capital gains tax and bond duration turned into a raging voice that screamed:

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE?? THIS IS NOT HOW YOU WANT TO SPEND YOUR LIFE!!!

It took me another decade before I could screw up the courage to start listening to that voice. And I'm still figuring out what else it's trying to tell me.

The Offspring - Self Esteem(buy here)
There was a soundtrack to Darmstadt, provided by MTV Deutschland. And this song became a personal anthem.

Rednex - Cotton-Eye Joe(buy here, but get out of my shower if you do)
What MTV gaveth with one hand, with the other it tooketh away. This Swedish brain-drilling drivel would, without fail, always come on while I was having my morning shower and thus unable to reach the set.

Lassie Singers - Es Ist So Schade (buy here)
Maybe to apologize for repeated lashings of The Rednex, MTV Deutschland also offered me this wee gem: a hooky, catchy bit of breezy pop with the bitchiest lyrics you could ever hope to hear. Translated from the German, they go something like this: "It's such a shame / That you are how you are / That, unfortunately, you aren't someone else / That, unfortunately, you are just yourself."

Popchor Berlin - 4 My People (buy here or e-here)
I only recently discovered that Lassie Singer Almut Klotz later went on to form the outstanding collective, Popchor Berlin. Thrill as these Teutonic choristers take Missy Elliott to places she never thought she'd go.